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Showing posts from July, 2016

Joke of the Day

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One day God called Jesus and his helpers into a meeting. God said that he wanted them to create a data base on heaven’s super computer. He said He wanted them to list everyone who had ever been born and all the good and bad things that each had done since the beginning of time. They all said they could do that and so they sat at their keyboards for hours, then days and weeks. Finally they were almost done when there was a power failure in heaven and the computers all went off. Only seconds later the lights came back on and all the computers started to re-boot. There was much crying and gnashing of teeth and pounding of keyboards as this happened. Down at the end of the table sat Jesus with a big smile on His face. Why was Jesus smiling amongst all this dismay? Jesus Saves! Hahaha!

Opportunity 2 by Pastor Charles Famodimu

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We lose opportunities when we do not know who we are. David knew the oil of God was already upon him and so a new spirit, not of fear but of sound mind was upon him to tackle issues of life successfully. He decided to take a step towards achieving the name that heaven had given him. If the message you preach or is being preached is not changing you, then you are wasting your time. We also lose opportunities when we fail to recognize them. That’s why when you are working for God you shouldn’t expect commendations from your leader because it is not man that you work for but God in the leader. Therefore, that seed of faithfulness in you (Faithfulness you exhibit) is an elevator that brings you your lifting. We lose opportunities when we don’t know who our leader (your master, pastor, prophet or boss) is. To succeed in life you must know (a) God (b) the devil (c) your master (d) yourself. One thing we can learn from the devil is that he does not give up while Christians give up easily wi

Who you are speaks louder to me than anything you can say

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At the beginning of my 8:00 a.m. class one Monday at University of Nevada, Las Vegas (UNLV), I cheerfully asked my students how their weekend had been. One young man said that his weekend had not been very good. He'd had his wisdom teeth extracted. The young man then proceeded to ask me why I always seemed to be so cheerful. His question reminded me of something I'd read somewhere before: "Every morning when you get up, you have a choice about how you want to approach life that day", I said to the young man. "I choose to be cheerful". "Let me give you an example", I continued. The other 60 students in the class ceased their chatter and began to listen to our conversation. As soon as I got there, I called AAA and asked them to send a tow truck. The secretary in the Provost's office asked me what had happened. "This is my lucky day", I replied, smiling. "Your car breaks down and today is your lucky day??" She was puzzled. &

Joke of the Day

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This 85 year old couple, having been married almost 60 years, had died in a car crash. They had been in good health the last ten years mainly due to her interest in health food, and exercise. When they reached the pearly gates, St. Peter took them to their mansion which was decked out with a beautiful kitchen and master bath suite and Jacuzzi. As they "oohed and aahed" the old man asked Peter how much all this was going to cost. "It's free," Peter replied, "this is Heaven." Next they went out back to survey the championship golf course that the home backed up to. They would have golfing privileges everyday and each week the course changed to a new one representing the great golf courses on earth. The old man asked, "what are the green fees?". Peter's reply, "This is heaven, you play for free." Next they went to the club house and saw the lavish buffet lunch with the cuisines of the world laid out. "How much to eat?

TOP MOST BEAUTIFUL CITIES IN THE WORLD

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6. Paris The Seine and the bridges that cross it, the grand boulevards, the monumental squares, the magnificent monuments, the charming streets of Montmartre -- these images of Paris confirm that it is indeed the most elegant and sophisticated of all cities. It has inspired practically every major world capital, with every city claiming its own Champs-Elysèes, and Place des Vosges becoming the prototype of residential squares throughout Europe. Sit at an outdoor café table or go on a boat tour of the Seine and see it all romantically flash before your eyes. -SEE MORE PICS BELOW LOUVRE MUSEUM NOTRE DAME CATHEDRAL CHAMPS-ELYSÈES EIFFEL TOWER THE SEINE MONTMARTRE PALACE OF VERSAILLES LATIN QUARTER / LUXEMBOURG PARK MOULIN ROUGE DISNEYLAND PARIS

Joke of the Day

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Johnny was going off to church one morning with several of his friends. His mother gave him two nickels, " One for you and one for god," she said. As Johnny and his friends walked along, He was flipping a nickel up in the air and catching it, over and over. Finally, one time he missed it and it rolled down a sewer. "Oops!" he said. "There goes God's nickel!"

Family Happiness

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There were two houses standing next to each other. In one of them resided a very unhappy family. The spouses yelled at each other, they fought and quarreled all the time. The other was a place of happiness and calm. During one of the fights a wife asked her husband: “Did you ever hear them quarrel or yell over at that house? No! So, go there and see what they do to avoid it!” The husband stood at the window of his neighbors and watched. There they were busy doing their own thing. The wife was in the kitchen cooking, and the man sat at the table writing. The phone rang, and the man jumped up and headed to the hallway to get it. On his way he bumped into a vase, it fell and broke. He got down to his knees and started picking up the pieces. The wife ran into the room from the kitchen. She also kneeled down and started helping her husband to pick them up. The man said to his wife: “I am so sorry. I rushed to get the phone and bumped into the vase. It fell and got broken.” The wife

Joke of the Day

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Johnny was coming home from church one Sunday morning with his mother. His mother noticed he had a serious look on his face. "What's on your mind, Johnny?" she asked. "Is it true what the preacher said about us all coming from dust and turning back to dust?" " Why , Yes, it is, Johnny," she said. "Why do you ask?" "Well, when we get home," he answered, "You better look under my bed, because someone's either comin' or goin!" Lolz

Go the extra mile

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I was 20 and had just finished my first degree when I aksed my father's advice on how to approach the world of work. He had a long and distinguished career in the Indian Army and rose to become commander-in-chief of a million men. He was a soldier's soldier and his men adored him. His manner was strict and firm, but he was very friendly. He appreciated and trusted people and gave then freedom. "Come and see me in my office if you want to talk to me about work" he said. So I made an appointment with his ADC and went to see him. He had a huge office and I felt very small. "You are starting out and you will be given a lot of tasks to fulfil" he said. "The first thing is always to do something to the best of your ability. Then the second time you do it, give it that little bit extra". What he was saying was: "Take the initiative; be innovative; be creative. Always go the extra mile." Source: Karan Bilimoria, founder and chief executive of

Joke of the Day

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A mother was teaching her 3 year old daughter the Lord's prayer. For several evenings at bedtime she repeated it after her mother. One night she said she was ready to solo. The mother listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word right up to the end "Lead us not into temptation" she prayed, "but deliver us some E-mail, Amen".

A sharpened axe

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Once upon a time, a very strong woodcutter asked for a job in a timber merchant and he got it. The pay was really good and so was the work condition. For those reasons, the woodcutter was determined to do his best. His boss gave him an axe and showed him the area where he supposed to work. The first day, the woodcutter brought 18 trees. “Congratulations,” the boss said. “Go on that way!” Very motivated by the boss words, the woodcutter tried harder the next day, but he could only bring 15 trees. The third day he tried even harder, but he could only bring 10 trees. Day after day he was bringing less and less trees. “I must be losing my strength”, the woodcutter thought. He went to the boss and apologized, saying that he could not understand what was going on. “When was the last time you sharpened your axe?” the boss asked. “Sharpen? I had no time to sharpen my axe. I have been very busy trying to cut trees…” Reflection: Our lives are like that. We sometimes get so busy that we

The Mouse Trap

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A mouse looked through the crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife open a package. "What food might this contain?" the mouse wondered. He was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap. Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning: "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said "Mr.Mouse, I can tell this is a grave concern to you, but it is of no consequence to me. I cannot be bothered by it." The mouse turned to the pig and told him "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The pig sympathized, but said "I am so very sorry, Mr.Mouse, but there is nothing I can do about it but pray. Be assured you are in my prayers." The mouse turned to the cow and said "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The cow said "Wow, Mr. Mouse. I'm sorry for you, but

Joke of the Day

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Alan bought a horse, a religious horse it appeared. Strangely, the horse only reacted to two words: the word "Hallelujah" to make it go, and "Amen" to make it stop. Excited, Alan took his new horse out on the range and was riding it happily when he realised he was heading towards the edge of a cliff. Terrified, Alan forgot which word was the one to stop the horse. Obviously wanting to prevent falling over the cliff to certain death, he bellowed out a prayer ending with the word - Amen. Phew! The horse stopped. 'Hallelujah,' shouted the relieved Alan.

TOP MOST BEAUTIFUL CITIES IN THE WORLD

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5. Lisbon Magnificently sited on a series of hills running down to the grand Tagus River, Lisbon is one of the world's most scenic cities. Beautiful unexpected views are found at every turn down its colorful, picturesque streets, and especially from strategically-placed viewpoints or terraces at the top of each hill. The city has an unpolished, seductive appearance; an effortless beauty with captivating details such as cobbled designs, tiled façades, and pastel-colored buildings blending together to give it a singular atmosphere now lost in so many other cities. In such a stunning place, it's no wonder that many of the world's great explorers questioned what other beauties lied beyond the horizon when they departed from here in the 15th century. -SEE MOST PICS Design Museum Ancient Art Museum Sao Roque Church Tile Museum Berardo Museum Vasco-Da-Gama Bridge Gulbenkian Museum Saint George Castle Belem Tower Jeronimos Monastery

The Miracle Sister

“Tess, an eight-year-old child heard her parents talking about her little brother. All she knew was that he was very sick and they had no money left. They were moving to a smaller house because they could not afford to stay in the present house after paying the doctor’s bills. Only a very costly surgery could save him now and there was no one to loan them the money. When she heard her daddy say to her fearful mother with whispered desperation, ‘Only a miracle can save him now’, the little girl went to her bedroom and pulled her piggy bank from its hiding place in the closet. She poured all the change out on the floor and counted it carefully. Clutching the precious piggy bank tightly, she slipped out from the back door and made her way six blocks to the local drugstore. She took a quarter from her bank and placed it on the glass counter. “And what do you want?” asked the pharmacist. “It’s for my little brother,” the girl answered back. “He’s really very sick and I want to buy a mir

Helping hand

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A mother, wishing to encourage her son's progress at the piano, bought tickets to a performance by the great Polish pianist Ignace Paderewski. When the evening arrived, they found their seats near the front of the concert hall and eyed the majestic Steinway waiting on the stage. Soon the mother found a friend to talk to, and the boy slipped away. At eight o'clock, the lights in the auditorium began to dim, the spotlights came on, and only then did they notice the boy - up on the piano bench, innocently picking out "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star." His mother gasped in shock and embarassment but, before she could retrieve her son, the master himself appeared on the stage and quickly moved to the keyboard. He whispered gently to the boy, "Don't quit. Keep playing." Leaning over, Paderewski reached down with his left hand and began filling in the bass part. Soon his right arm reached around the other side and improvised a delightful obligato. Together, the

Joke of the Day!

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A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to church service, “And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?” One bright little girl replied, “Because people are sleeping.”

One tip for a healthy living

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Ex Indian President Dr. Abdul Kalam once told this story: "When I was a kid, my Mom cooked food for us. One night that stood out in my mind is when she had made dinner for us after a very long and rough day at work, She placed a plate of jam and extremely burned toast in front of my dad. Not slightly burnt but completely blackened toast. I was just waiting to see if anyone noticed the burnt toast and say anything. But Dad just ate his toast and asked me if I did my homework and how my day was. I don’t remember what I told him that night, but I do remember hearing my mom apologizing to dad for burning the toast. And I’ll never forget what he said: “Sweetie, I love burned toast.” Later that night, I went to tell my dad good night and ask him if he really liked his toast burned. He put his arm on my shoulder and said, “Your momma put in a very long day at work today and she was very tired. And besides, A burnt toast never hurts anyone but you know what does? Harsh words!” The

TOP MOST BEAUTIFUL CITIES IN THE WORLD

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4. Rio De Jenerio There are those who say God created the world in six days and devoted a seventh to Rio. The city is indeed blessed with one of the most stunning settings in the world, making it the most naturally beautiful city in the world. Even if it was deserted of buildings and population, anyone standing at the top of the famous Sugarloaf Mountain or by the Corcovado statue would see one of the world's most beautiful landscapes. Green, tropical luxuriance mixes with the blue of the ocean and the brightness of the sand at the beaches, proving that this is indeed "the marvelous city" as locals call it. Not to forget it would be hosting this year 2016 Olympic Games. - See more pics below Lagoa NEIGHBOURHOOD MARACANA STADIUM TUJICA NATIONAL PARK LAPA NEIGHBOURHOOD SANTA TERESA NEIGHBORHOOD JARDIM BOTANICO SUGARLOOF MOUNTAIN IPANEMA COPACABANA CHRIST THE REDEEMER

Get up! Get moving!

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This is one of the GREATEST stories ever told in Hollywood. His name is Sylvestar Stallone. One of the BIGGEST and Most famous American Movie superstars. Back in the day, Stallone was a struggling actor in every definition. At some point, he got so broke that he stole his wife's jewellery and sold it. Things got so bad that he even ended up homeless. Yes, he slept at the New York bus station for 3 days. Unable to pay rent or afford food. His lowest point came when he tried to sell his dog at the liquor store to any stranger. He didn't have money to feed the dog anymore. He sold it at $25 only. He says he walked away crying. Two weeks later, he saw a boxing match between Mohammed Ali and Chuck Wepner and that match gave him the inspiration to write the script for the famous movie, ROCKY. He wrote the script for 20 hours! He tried to sell it and got an offer for $125,000 for the script. But he had just ONE REQUEST. He wanted to STAR in the movie. He wanted to be the MAIN ACT

The rich poor man

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Once upon a time in a faraway land, there lived a Chinese wise man and his disciple. One day in their travels, they saw a hut in the distance. As they approached they realized that it was occupied in spite of its extremely poor appearance. In that desolate place where there were no crops and no trees, a man lived with his wife, three young children and a thin, tired cow. Since they were hungry and thirsty, the wise man and his disciple stopped for a few hours and were well received. At one point, the wise man asked: “This is a very poor place, far away from anything. How do you survive?” “You see that cow? That’s what keeps us going,” said the head of the family. “She gives us milk, some of it we drink and some were make into cheese. When there is extra, we go into the city and exchange the milk and cheese for other types of food. That’s how we survive.” The wise man thanked them for their hospitality and left. When he reached the first bend in the road, he said to his disciple: “